I want to start out by saying, “If your name is Ken Clark, and you are my Dad, then stop reading now.” The title of this blog is not just to get your attention only to find, after reading, that I am talking about making my soul naked or some such. This is about physical NAKEDNESS [so Retha, if you could not read this to Dr. Maddox, that would be nice too :)].
I took a shower at the gym again today, which, with all of the naked older ladies running around, got me thinking about nakedness. I feel like I keep waiting for that day to come, when I am in just the right shape, and have developed just the right amount of self-confidence that I will be able to run around our house butt-naked…like my Mom did. It hasn’t happened yet. And, from what statistics say (and from the ninety-something-year-old bodies running pell-mell around me in the locker room) I would say that things tend to get worse in that department instead of better.
I have evidence of this very fact in my own short life already. I can remember, just before Jeremiah and I got married, I had sort of a panic attack about feeling like I was “tricking” him into marrying me without really knowing what he was buying into. I worked up the courage one night when we were watching a movie at his house to say as much:
Me: Jeremiah, I am worried that we are going to get married and you’re going to see me naked, and then it’s going to be too late for you to get out if you don’t like what you see. I mean, do you think I should just flash you or something and get it over with? [way to help the weaker brother hold strong, sweet little Christian girl :)]
Jeremiah: I have seen you in a bikini lots of times. Is there really that much more to see?
Me: (Feeling at least a moderate rush of relief at this realization) You know, I guess you’re right!
Jeremiah: Now, go home immediately before I change my mind 🙂
So there I was, obviously insecure about nakedness then, and now I look back at our honeymoon pictures and wonder what in the world I was self-conscious about? That was the time to seize nakedness for all it was worth. I missed my chance!
Then, a couple of days ago, I finished reading (listening to actually) Great Expectations. I remembered there being a movie with Gwyneth Paltrow and Ethan Hawke, so I looked up the trailer to see if we should rent it. This is what I found: SEDUCTIVE TRAILER
That scene, where Gwyneth sheds her clothes like it’s no big thing and plops casually down to be painted made me say, “DADGUM, that is sexy. I want that confidence!” Isn’t that what men always say (and women too for that matter)? The sexiest thing about a person is their confidence in themselves. There is no way that Gwyneth Paltrow doesn’t have little boobies and some wobbly bits that aren’t her favorites, but there she is working it like it’s 1999.
So, I’ve decided that there is no time like the present…to get naked. I don’t want to look back in ten years, at pictures that I am taking now, and wonder why I didn’t go ahead and be confident in all my nakedness. Things are not like I want them to be, but will they ever be? Do I want to always be a little shy in front of my husband who loves me and just wants me to be as confident in myself as he is in me? No, I don’t. I am going to throw caution to the wind, embrace my inner Gwyneth, and get all confident in my naked self. I encourage you to do the same 🙂 and let me know how it goes. Just kidding, I think we all better screen that one…
P.S. I am drawing a name tonight, so you better comment if you want to be in the drawing!
Abby- this post is too funny…
The funny thing is, I DID run this by the censorship board (aka Jeremiah), and THIS is the censored version 🙂 If only you’d been sitting by the computer for the five minutes this afternoon when I was feeling rebellious and published it anyway… Really, I just changed one, slightly key, sentence 🙂
abby, you crack me up!!
Too funny! I wanted to say that I love your transparency, but that just doesn’t quite sound right with this post! Ha ha ha!
Love how you can just “say it all” – wish I was that transparent – and I agree with Darby – nursing 3 children in 4 years does a number on them! But I agree, as I’m getting older, I’m definitely getting more comfortable with myself! Having a 2 year old boy that is absolutely OBSESSED with touching body parts and laughing and chasing me around trying to put his finger in my bottom kind of limits the whole walking around the house naked thing!
Abby, I can honestly say that I walk around naked all the time. Never really thought about it being a big deal – although, I do live alone. Embrace it – trust me, it is a free feeling.
I was laughing through this entire post. I feel exactly the same way. I will get some things fixed one day either by the dr. or by some major working out. Neither of which I have time for right now. Charles thinks I look great but I don’t like what I see. I told my sister I could actually wear a training bra my boobs were so small. I don’t think they learned what they were supposed to the first time around.
Justin didn’t like my first comment and I didn’t really like it either… so I’m back to “re-comment”. And now I can’t think of anything to say… that I think he would think would be ok to publish on the internet about my body and what I like or dislike about it. So… I guess I’ll just say… “good post”. 🙂
I thoroughly enjoyed that post :).
So true!! Your stories are just too funny!
Way to go!!!! I feel the same way you did. Although I haven’t quite embraced my nakedness yet. Hopefully one day I will though.
I am just going to attest to what Abby said about her mom. I would say “Becky, do you realize that people that drive by your house can see you running around butt neked?” (they really couldn’t but I would mess with her cause she was always naked!) She would just laugh in that wonderful free spirited laugh that she had! I always admired the fact that she was one of the most immodest people I’ve ever known. Abby you are a hoot girl and so much more like your mom than you even realize!
Abby, you are the most modest of us four. Yet you have the best body of us four, and you have had 2 kids! I love this post, best so far! I only request that you close your back door curtains and lock the door if you are undressed, thanks 🙂
I must say- its about time! just act like you are running pool to pool!
LOVE your post Abby! Hilarious! We all have these feelings–especially after kids!!
You are hilarious!! I’m glad you’re working on your confidence, I guess I need to do the same: )!
You go for it! Do it now…not later! LOL… I wouldn’t run any where not clothed today! Those days slip by wayyyyyy to fast…So just do it! Besides…Seattle is colder! LOL… Enjoy the moment!
Atta Girl!!!! LOL! Crackin’ me up—no pun intended.
I smiled all the way through this post!! LOVED EVERY WORD OF IT (especially the first sentence haha), and its all so TRUE! I am a very modest person myself, so I can totally relate! Let us know how it goes!
Abby…this post was so funny, and I’m thankful someone has the courage to talk about stuff like this. But I still find it crazy that you worry at all! You have always looked so good every time I run in it to you. I guess it just goes to show that girls are girls, no matter what. And by the way, your conversation with Jeremiah before your wedding was hillarious! I definitely had the same thoughts before I got married!
Keep up the good posts!
Hilarious and SO true!! I think after you have kids that nothing shifts back to where it’s supposed to be- at least to you… But I agree with you! Embrace it because it may be the best thing you’ve got going in the next 10 years!! Love it!
I can still hear YOUR Dad, our Sr. Class Prez…yelling the Senior Class Motto: "LLLLeeettt'ssss Geeeett, Nekkkkid!" like it was yesterday. Enjoyed the entry, Mrs. Maddox. Thanks. MMJ